Keep.

>  In the old fashion way.


Click on the link,
listen,
look.

Promise that these things,
that we'll keep them.
Breathe into them so that,
they dont die.

Just as everything else.

When you're good at something, never do it for free.

and then, there's always bobby

Forever no

Always.

There is no end,
why do I see those eyes,
Whom i dont want to see.

Why is there no end?

It's not right.

The gigantic pressure that has planted itself inside my forehead.
The constant feeling of being pushed ahead of myself.

Im tired of trying,
Im tired of not knowing,
feeling like somethings missing,
the fear,
the crave,

the thunder in my heart.

The one thing i fear the most,
is the future,
not knowing what will happen to me.

What if i die unhappy with my life?

Gbg

This is good,
Gothenburg.

Cant wait to move here.
Right now im with my cousin & her boyfriend,
watching films,
eating candy,
talking.

It's nice.

Where the light is

statues

yes, id like that.

for the future

Going down to gothenburg tomorrow.

Nervous.

Im gonna have a meeting with my - hopefully - future boss as a fashion photographer.

The name is more glamorous than the particular job though,
but still,
fashion fotographer.

Sounds awesome.

starting new

Fuck ive missed this.

What have I been doing lately?

I've met amazing new people. People that inspire me in wanting to be more of myself. They've given life to my curiosity in being a well-informed person. I want to read and understand politics, history, religion and other topics.
They're loving, hilarious, gentle and true.

I've also decided to give my career as a fashion Photographer more life.

.. other than that? No.
Im in a good place right now.

So please, bury him deep.Please keep that man from me.

took some funny pictures of my boyfriend and his friends last night, thanks guys!

 the pictures couldnt have been better. 

I had this idea for a million years, and i told them about it and they got so excited to do it. 

More pictues may come,

I dunno.

when you've been blind

I guess the time is right. I just cant understand why it had to go so far.
The only thing that's left is why noone told me. Noone told me the biggest secret of all.

I'm sorry.
You're bigger than you think.

when the other side is calling

I just hate school right now.

It's so much work to do all the time and it feels like i'll never get everything done.
I've got until the 24th to write four essays and a radioshow.


I'm going to die.
Rebecka, if you read this, all my cd's are yours if i die.

with every occasion

when youve been at the bottom

Hi.

this blog has been buried for a long time, and at the same time, ive been burying some old parts of myself.
Ive been nothing but confused, stressed out and selfdestructive.

Ive been trying to find new ways in a  sea of mud.
but i think im on my way out.

ive got a feeling that only good awaits now.

WHATAFUCKINGISAP?

gotta change my boring behavior.

Oh fuck, this weekend has been nothing else then great fun.

Friday, going out, dancing out fucking heads off, going home.
Saturday, going out, having fun, dancing our fucking asses off, going home.

really gotta stop this going home, we're the fuck is the afterparty?

i've gotta become better at that point.

I dont know if you, noticed anything different.

everything beautiful must die

i love my new photo-editing-program-thingy.

it's kind of the best.

Bobby Long.

Click on it, its really breathtaking.

 

right now,

that would have been kind of nice.

so much for the freakin pizza

oh shit fuck!
this has never in my life happened to me before.
Im ... chocked. this is so weird and wrong and not usual. It's not normal. i feel ..... WEIRD.
im hungover...



Btw im still at my friends house and the only thing we've been managed to do today, is eating chips. yum

whaett?

Listening to heavy, heavy and more heavy deep housemusic, drinking beer and hanging out with two of my best friends.

wondering when are the party getting started.

oh!
it has already started.

She's doing a very good job with

the best

 song in the whole fucking, entire universe.

I love my life as liz. And i've kind of fallen for Bryson.

its hot in herrre!?

Fuck everything.

Just got a mail that my creditcard didnt work when ordering the triad necklace.

fuck internet, im going to the tv.

51. To erase yourself from someone's life, is'nt as easy as walking out the door.

king A, this hurricane's chasing us all underground.

no we won't get caught.

goodmorning.

or good day.

 Good night.

Maybe.

Your choice.

1157

snow isnt really my thing.

I feel like harry potter when i say this but "USA feels like the place to be".

I wanna get out of here. I hate sweden. If someone here read my blog and does not come from sweden, I love you with all my heart. Especially if you come from usa. Im going there someday. without a returnal-ticket.

I hate the snow every winter. I hate the shitty weather even if its summer. oh alright, when its 25C and a BIG blue sky im okay.

If every day looked something like this i'd be very alright.



It's really boring actually. But if you are bored, i think you'll understand.

Oh fuck. been sitting by the computer and the tv watching movies all day. Dont figure why my stomach is trying to talk to me, i havent moved an inch! did see this new Disneymovie Tangled. lauged my ass off, see it! and another one called Charlie St. Cloud, a really emotional and meaningful movie. Liked it alot, cried alot.
The third movie was How to be. Robert Pattinson actually impressed me with his acting-skills. I felt weird after watching it. Felt like i wanted to stare into a wall, pick up my guitar and song these super-depressed songs about how unhappy i am. Guess they succeded with the movie.

I've also been trying to learn some new songs at my guitar just to get away from the non-intellectual stuff i've been doing. Tried out never think by robert pattinson. Been trying to figure out that song for ages but it dosent seem to work along with my brain.. or something.

I need to take a walk. I really do.
Guess i'll have to. Get some fresh air. Go down to my mum's and talk to my cat. cuz my brothers dosent even respond when i want to talk to them. I do think computer eventually fuck your brains out. Not litterally though. But atleast messing with your intellect so that you soon enough dont even remember your own name, and the only thing you'll be able to say is "oh fuck i died!".
I've Heard people have died.

heavy shit man.

shit as fuck!

Hate people who notice words more then the whole sentence.

"Some people ask us if this is a cult. I say this: It's something special, It's not for everyone, It's only for those who understand" - jared leto.

 

would you wanna go with me?

This years have-to-get.

1. A new guitar.

2. Dr Martens. Black.

and finally..

3. A longboard.

i''ve grown sick of riding some shitty skateboard the whole summer.

ive got to much dreams and no time.

I miss the summer.
I hate this fucking coldness, it makes me sad.

I want to sit in my garden in the evening, under the big fucking thing that looks like a giant umbrella that i don't know the english word to and that i am to lazy to look up, and read. I want to read hundreds of poetic books and smoke cigarettes when the air is still warm even though it's 22 o'clock in the evening.

I remember when i ran to the library every day last summer. The ladies who work there started to smile when i walked through the door. I thought like "yea, ive been here every day this week and last week. So what? no, we're not bundies, and no, i wont smile back. Im going to listen too my music, get the books i want, buy some raisins on the way home WITHOUT smiling to you"

Right now.

70s punkera

Television
The Velvet Underground
Patti Smith

give it a shot.

Wo we start the new year with goodlooking faces.

search and destroy.

I guess summoning 2010 as it has been lies at it's place, dosen't it?


But now when i think about it i can't remember very much from it, guess i havent been very observant while living through it. But a few things do appear.
I lived through the spring only on the hopes for the summer. I did have a period somewhere just between winter and spring when the only thing I wanted was to get out of here, leave everyone i knew, everything i was. I couldnt find anything that was precious enough to me that would make me stay in this shithole to town.
But spring went and summer came, me and my friends in school got closer. Peace&love could have been much better, but one person was there to light the whole thing up for me and we went through light and darkness, she lost her mobilephone and I lost my clubmasters. But we fought through the shitty puss without.
 I ended my summerholiday in Härnösand with my cousins and after that stockholm with good friends.
Somewhere here i began to understand what it was that i didnt want to keep, what I wanted to be, what i wanted to leave behind and what i had to do to become. Everything changed.
Autumn was at my doorstep and i turned 18. Me and my friends became closer the ever. I started to understand what i did put validation into, what i was looking for in other people and what i thought was important in life, so i chased after it.
I went through alot of changes within and a friend intriduced housemusic to me. I was hooked, but somewhere i couldnt understand why i still always wanted change.
The autumn became colder. I met my cousins again and this period ran away with nothing to hold on to. The autumn was suddenly over, my tattoo became the mirror to my heart and soul and the winter had began. And i guess it was somewhere here i understood music was my fire, and i spent alot of time dreaming through my windows at night looking at the stars above. A very good friend appeared 1000 miles away from here, Sidewalk youth was born and now we're suddenly halfway through winter.

But there are a few things im proud of. I found my love in 30stm. I got to now myself better. And i got one HELL of a start to 2011 that can be nothing else then the start to the new me.
I dont want anything to change.

so, whatever you do don't be afraid of the dark. Cover your eyes, the devil's inside.

new years eve

here's what you do

I saw the light coming from my window.

I had noone to shoot but myself.

in my mind its all different anyhow.

I've had a really nice christmasday.
Saw the last Narniafilm this morning as we always have done since the first movie came out.
and the yearly gifts for me was alot of things. Thinking about taking some cool photos or something and post.

Ye, Merry Christmas to all of u.

I need a place to hide before the storm begins.

Can't wait!! Theyre coming to sweden to play their so damn good music and im going to be there! With two of my best friends and YES! we're going to have one hell of a time!

.. hehe .. and all of the .. rockerboys. hehehe



music all over the place.

Ï just ordered one hell of a nice necklace from USA. The Thirty Seconds to mars-triad. Mmhm, yummy. 230 swedish crowns. Not much for be shipped all over pretty much the whole world.
I would like to order some CD's too. Like The gaslight anthem, the black keys, Rolling Stones, The animals ... ye stuff like that.

I went to a nearby city to buy the rest of all the christmaspresents. And when i was going to go get the TheDoors-tshirt... it was all out of stock.

got alot of .. what?

Today i am going to run around the whole city buying christmaspresents, visiting my birthday-girl-friend, doing all the little stuff ready and then maybe i'll be able to squeeze some dancingtime later on the night.

Last night i had a hard time to fall asleep. So i, in some weird kind of way ended up thinking about people. Every living soul in this planet. Everyone. Every single one has their own little "bubble" if i can call life a bubble. Just like me. Theyre exactly thesame. They have their own plans, thoughts, feelings, directions in life.
I use to capture myself thinking about it when im out. The people i meet on the street, in stores, on the bus. Where are they going? where have they been? what horrible or beautiful things have she been through? and him, what dreams does he have? It's maybe a weirdo thing to think about. But yesterday i actually understood the meaning of two things i have read.

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle"
"Through yourself you know others"

Its a heavy thing for a curious human being like me.

Ye.

Now i have to try it out through the fire.

I like the smell of today.

Been hangin' out with my so damn cool friend rebecka. Went to a nearby city and checked out some secondhand stores. She bought a wicked blazer and i a wicked earring on the best stores of all, h&m.


And some heavy music: 
The strokes - You only live once 
Kings of Leon - Four kicks

shitload

 

got heavy feet

Been at work all day.
Served some guys from Holland. They were really cool and i had been missing the sound of english not pronounced with a swedish accent.

The painting for my friend got finished yesterday after about 12 hours working on it.

And the last thing im going to write is that im going back to school tomorrow after six weeks of workplace practice. I've missed it!

can't even listen to their music. It just gives me some heavy shitload of depressed feelings.

If some asshole would walk up to me and say i will never get the chance to see these guys live, it'd be written allover my face "I may look calm, but in my mind i've killed you three times".

Oh babe.

Photos like these keep my love to photography burning.